I don't think any more needs to be said.

Here's my response.

BTW, my response was making the recording. CJ is the artiste.

The My Little Pony Unicorn

here's another paragraph.

After many years. (OK, only two).

I can finally do this:

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Franchise Tax Board
PO Box 942867
Sacramento CA 94267-0011

To Whom It May Concern,

I am writing in response to your correspondence on 07/28/06 regarding the status of my tax payments. Phrases such as "FINAL NOTICE" and "This is your final demand for payment." gave it such a sense of urgency that I chose to reply immediately, rather than waiting for it to age properly before responding. And, let's face it, the great state of California is not a power to be ignored, especially when it threatens to "begin collection actions without further notice to you." Allowing the notice to sit untended for even a few days gives me the the kind of thrill I can not get from pursuits such as skydiving or hang gliding, because my wife does not permit me to engage in such activities. She much prefers my presence to my copious life insurance, bless her heart. But back to business.

The total due on 07/28/06 was $3186.20.

What puzzled me was that I had a specific memory of paying my state taxes for 2005. When I filed my taxes I tried to set up an installment plan, but something must have gone wrong because it didn't "take". After a suitable period of time I received notice that my taxes were past due along with the
very strong suggestion that I should pay them forthwith. I confess to allowing the letter to age a little, a couple of weeks for my personal enjoyment, then paid the balance of $3150.22 using the online payment system. The amount I paid included penalties and interest, which is not unexpected when you stiff the Great State of California however unintentionally. According to my bank statement the money was withdrawn on 07/07/2006. I freely admit that I was careless and did not save my transaction number.

Here we get to the crux of the matter. Having already paid the State a great deal of money I was determined not to pay it again, at least not without further salvos of letters containing ever-escalating and more-dire threats of collections and assorted legal actions. So I called the number on the notice, spent some quality time with the automated call-routing system featuring a lovelier-than-usual female voice, was able to obtain my balance.

My balance as of today is $10.00.

The lovely automated female voice informed me that payments may take 45 days to process. "Aha!" I said to myself, "That explains the notice." I presume the ten dollar balance is the interest between my first notice and when my payment was applied. While I am happy not to owe the Great and
Threatening State of California ever-increasing amounts of money, I am tempted to withhold the remaining ten dollars to eek out a few more grams of adrenalin from the whole experience. My wife, ever disapproving even my lamest attempts at thrill-seeking, insists we send the money right away.
Please find enclosed our check for ten dollars.

So here's my question. If it takes 45 days to process my ten dollar payment, am I going to be charged further interest and penalty fees? A month and a half is a long time, more than enough for the Great Interest Bearing State of California to decide I owe just a little more money. If executed properly you could turn minor balances into major cash flows, a fact not lost on credit card companies. Will I be trapped in a never-ending cycle of ever-smaller balances coupled with escalating legal language? Or will you add huge penalties as well, tacking your $126.00 "collection fee" onto the seventeen cents of interest? Will my wages be garnished? Will my home be taken from me?

It would be nice if, after you receive and process my payment, you could send me some kind of notice or statement or something to let me know if I'm paid in full. As much as I enjoy our little correspondences, it all has to end somewhere. But don't be too sad about it, we'll see each other next year. I promise.

Sincerely,

CJ Holmes

Enclosures: Check #902 for $10.
cc: 2005 Sate Tax Folder

The VAX played an important part in my life. It's how I met my husband, and most of my other friends (like Julie, Christine, Jim and Andru). Yes, that's pretty geeky, I admit. My friend Julie turned me on to Cafe Vax, a bulletin board of sorts using VAX Notes. It was run by Tim, who also authored the widely acclaimed "VAX for Virgins" and hosted many Cafe Vax f2f gatherings. And that's where I met Courtney.

The first thing I remember hearing about Courtney was from Julie: "You should meet Courtney - he wore my lipstick!"

Mythotopical
Adjective

1. referring to the confluence of current events with events, creatures or symbols of mythological origins.


2. referring to a creamy medication, possibly mythical or magical, which when applied to the skin, counteracts the effects of curses or bad sci-fi/fantasy media.

An example from our TV viewing this afternoon, that satisfies both definitions: SciFi channel's Manticore


During Operation Iraqi Freedom, a US Army Squad is sent to a small Iraqi town to locate a missing news crew, only to find the residents of the town dead and a living Weapon of Mass Destruction, a Manticore, awaken from it's long slumber by a terrorist leader wanting to rid his land of the American invaders at any price. - imdb.com



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